


Teach Me How To Love

by megastarstrike



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Teachers, Fluff, M/M, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, background amamatsu, background kaimaki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-05-14 18:12:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14774658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megastarstrike/pseuds/megastarstrike
Summary: Shuuichi Saihara had been a biology teacher at Hope's Peak Academy for five years, only to suddenly be pushed to co-teach with another teacher he had never seen before in a program he wasn't familiar with after the termination of two teachers in the same program he had never interacted with. Biology was a field full of mysteries, but at least Shuuichi had earned a degree in that.As far as he knew, Shuuichi did not have a degree, much less a teaching license, in how to unravel the mystery that is Kokichi Ouma, his new co-teacher.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Pastelbandana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pastelbandana/gifts).



> so this literally took months of planning and... i blame pastelbandana for enabling me
> 
> huge thanks to tackycrows for betaing!

Shuuichi Saihara was not a gossiper. The science department at Hope’s Peak Academy wasn’t known for spreading rumors (it was known for starting unnecessary fire alarms), and as a ninth grade biology teacher, he was no exception. 

The fine arts department, on the other hand, did not function under the same rules. That became most apparent when a text came in right in the middle of his students taking a test.

He scrambled to take his phone off the table and shut it off, but the words caught his eye.

**Dr. Akamatsu:** did you hear about the 9th grade SPIRE teachers getting fired???

Huh. Shuuichi stopped in his tracks.

Kaede had served as the music teacher for seven years and was the one who had introduced him to the school and its staff. Over their years at the school together, they had become close enough to be considered best friends. That being said, she usually didn’t gossip with the other fine arts teachers. What changed?

Shuuichi glanced up. 

Every students’ heads were turned down towards the black tables typical of the science classrooms. Their pencils scratched against the paper as they filled in the bubbles designated for the multiple choice questions. A few eyebrows went up at the lines given for a short answer question, but it shouldn’t have been too hard to write.

It wouldn’t hurt to respond to one text, right?

**Shuuichi:** which teachers? The language arts one or the science one? Which grade?  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** 9th grade bio and english. Idk what they were fired for tsumugi wont say  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** but you know what that means!!!  
**Shuuichi:** what?  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** you might be the next spire teacher!!!  
**Shuuichi Saihara:** i… dont even know what spire is  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** ok i just asked angie and apparently its the STEM Program for Innovation Rigor and Excellence. Basically science + english = something about stem. Im the music teacher i dont know man

Shuuichi frowned down at his phone. He remembered sometime a few years ago when the headmaster had brought it up with the science teachers. His memory was foggy, but he could recall something about combining language arts and science into one class to foster an environment where students could do project-based work and to drive them towards the STEM path. Shuuichi probably would have accepted the opportunity, but it seemed more like they were trying to dilute the language arts aspect of the class rather than enhance it, so he stayed quiet until someone else took it up.

**Shuuichi:** do you know who else is doing spire?  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** uhhh other than our friends? Hiyoko said she has a list of people who might be taking it up  
**Shuuichi:** …. Wow. she has connections.  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** yeah the fine arts department has a group chat and everything  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** anyway i just wanted to give you a heads up. Have fun with your class!!

Shuuichi set his phone down just as one of his students walked up to his desk to turn the test in. He gave the student a sheepish smile and took the papers.

The student smirked at the phone but kept quiet, opting to work on a math assignment instead of exposing Shuuichi for breaking one of his own class rules.

Shuuichi let out a sigh of relief and turned back to answering emails. After reading through an email from Gonta warning about stepping on bugs he had somehow released in the school (again?) and another email from Kiyotaka reminding everyone about the stress of finals week, his thoughts drifted back to the news.

It wasn’t like Shuuichi was unfamiliar with the concept of co-teaching or the SPIRE program. A few of his friends like Himiko and Kaito already taught SPIRE, respectively being the chemistry and physics teachers for sophomores and juniors. And Shuuichi could recall more than one time when he had to co-teach with another science teacher like Gonta, who taught AP environmental science.

Why was he even worried about this? It wasn’t as if he would be picked for the position anyway.

But even as Shuuichi dismissed his second class and stepped outside his door to greet his next class, his thoughts couldn’t help but return to the news.

 

* * *

 

Shuuichi leaned back in his chair with a huff after his last class dismissed, shutting his eyes for only a second before focusing on the state of his room.

It was a relief to see the three tables in front of his desk were cleared, but the back three tables had pencils and papers scattered over them. An empty chip bag was left abandoned next to the sink under the cabinets. The biology posters hung up around his room were starting to tear at the edges from years of use. It was a room typical of the final month of school, but he frowned at the rule violations nonetheless.

After cleaning his room and setting it up for the next day, Shuuichi grabbed the worksheet off his desk and headed towards the copy room.

The school was separated into pods and room numbers, Shuuichi’s room being upstairs in the D pod. The pod assignments seemed to have no rhyme or reason to them (There was one time when he was stationed in the C pod, where he was sandwiched between the photography teacher and the business teacher. It wasn’t a fun year). A computer lab was stationed at the front of every pod, and a stairway was built in each corner of the building, though most people preferred to use the stairs in the middle of the connecting hallway.

Shuuichi was no exception. He took a step towards the middle staircase before bumping into a familiar figure. “Oh. Good afternoon, Rantarou.”

“Hey, Shuuichi,” Rantarou said, the corners of his lips tilting up into a smile. “Off to make copies?”

“Yeah, my kids just finished up a test. We’re starting another unit.” Shuuichi paused. “Though a lot of students missed out on the test… Was that because of another field trip?”

“Hey, I’m the AP human geography teacher. It’s not like I can help it.” He bit his lip and fumbled with the ring around his finger. “Actually, have you seen any of the calculus or language arts teachers? I haven’t seen them at all today, and I’m starting to get a bit wor—”

“Right here, dumb bitch,” came a voice before an arm was slung around Rantarou’s shoulders.

Rantarou froze at the contact but relaxed upon identifying the culprit. “Hey, Miu. Where were you?”

“Hell."

“Nice.”

That exchange wasn’t out of the blue for them. Though they usually had a third person, a short man with purple hair, with them… (Maybe that was the language arts teacher Rantarou was worried about?)

Shuuichi bid them a goodbye as they walked down to Rantarou’s classroom across from Shuuichi’s own room. He continued his trek down the stairs.

The hallway leading to the commons, while buzzing with activity in the morning, was empty. A few students filtered in and out of the double doors leading to the media center. The copy room was right next to the curriculum office, though he noted both were across the school from the headmaster’s office.

The only person in the copy room turned her head towards him before turning her head back to the papers in her hands. “Hey, Shuuichi.”

Shuuichi stationed himself at the copy machine across the room from her. “Hey, Maki.”

Maki Harukawa was the education teacher and mostly taught seniors (“Less annoying,” she claimed one day right after reprimanding a senior for being annoying). While she was Shuuichi’s friend, he knew she liked her space, and he liked his space as well.

Just as Shuuichi set his paper on the copy machine, the intercom above them buzzed to life with the headmaster’s voice.

“Would Shuuichi Saihara and Kokichi Ouma please report to the headmaster’s office? Thank you.”

Fear shot down Shuuichi’s spine. His eyes widened, and his mouth fell open.  _ Fuck, fuck, fuck, what did I do? _

Maki raised an eyebrow at his posture but held her hand out nonetheless. “I’ll copy your papers for you.”

“Thanks,” Shuuichi said, passing his papers to Maki. He stepped outside the room and walked towards the headmaster’s office with a heavy heart.

 

* * *

 

To say the headmaster’s office was intimidating would be a major understatement. Walking into the headmaster’s office felt as if he was walking through the gates of hell waiting for punishment by a power incomprehensible to humanity.

Two red chairs were already set in front of the headmaster’s wooden desk. Several pictures were set on the desk along with a stack of papers and cup full of colored pens. The headmaster, a man with brown, spiky hair, gave Shuuichi a gentle smile.

Shuuichi took a seat in the chair to the left and bowed his head. “Headmaster Naegi, what did you need me for?”

Makoto opened his mouth to respond before chuckling. “You don’t have to look so nervous, Mr. Saihara. I assure you it’s nothing bad. In fact, it might even be beneficial.”

“I-If you say so…” Shuuichi waited in silence, his fingers trembling. And in that silence, his thoughts grew worse.

_ What did I do? Am I being fired? No, the headmaster said it wasn’t bad. But what if I’m actually being fired? Or demoted? Or— _

A purple-haired man wearing a white uniform skipped into the headmaster’s office, humming a familiar tune Shuuichi couldn’t quite put a name to and distracting him from his unhelpful thoughts. He plopped down on the remaining chair with his arms folded behind his head and flashed Makoto a smile. “Hey, Headmaster Naegi! Is it time to fire me yet?”

Shuuichi’s breath hitched. How could someone be so nonchalant in the face of losing their job?

Makoto sighed, his face suddenly exhausted. “Mr. Ouma, I’m not going to fire you. I don’t have a reason to do so. Actually, this is the exact opposite.”

Whoever Mr. Ouma was raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Yes. I called both of you in here to discuss the SPIRE program,” Makoto said, shuffling around for papers. He picked one up from the messy pile. “SPIRE stands for STEM Program for Innovation, Rigor, and Excellence. It aims to provide quality STEM education for any and all students who express a desire to experience science through an engineering lens within a project or problem-based environment.”

“Don’t lie. Did you just read off the paper?”

Makoto gave them a sheepish smile, ducking his head. “Honestly? Yeah, I did.” He cleared his throat. “It’s a program that combines science and language arts, in layman’s terms. You may or may not have heard about the… termination of the previous teachers. Their classes are being taught by substitutes for now, but you two will be taking over next year.”

Shuuichi furrowed his eyebrows. “So you want us to…”

“Co-teach. So you will be sharing a curriculum with Mr. Ouma since the science lessons tie into the language arts lessons and vice versa. You won’t be sharing a classroom, but they will be right next to each other. Do either of you have any issues with that?”

The way Makoto asked the question didn’t make it sound like a question at all. Neither of the two spoke up.

“Great. We’ll email you the details and curriculum today. You are dismissed.” Makoto sighed and ran a hand through his hair as the two left the room. “Man, Touko’s gonna have a fit at all these papers…”

They managed to make it to the empty commons before both of them released a sigh. A few students passed by but barely spared them a glance as they walked out of the school through the double doors leading to the student parking lot. The tables reserved for lunchtime were folded and set away along the walls of the commons. Four white pillars covered with club fliers supported the second floor above them. Other than their breathing, the entire room was devoid of sound.

Another moment of silence passed between them before Shuuichi cleared his throat and said, “We’re teaching  _ Thinking Like A Mountain. _ ”

The other man blinked. “What?”

“It’s a book. It has similes.”

The man stared at him with a blank face before erupting into giggles. “Nishishi! Is that the only thing you know about language arts?”

“N-No! … Maybe?” Shuuichi stammered.

“I can tell we’re going to have a fun year already.” The man held a hand out and grinned. “I’m Kokichi Ouma, the ninth grade language arts teacher. I’m also the one responsible for all those book burnings in February. We’ve gotta learn  _ Fahrenheit 451 _ somehow.”

“What?”

“Just kidding! That was a lie. The burnings are in March.”

Was this seriously the person Shuuichi had to work with for the next year?

Shuuichi hesitated before taking the hand and shaking it with a less-than-firm grip. “I’m Shuuichi Saihara, the ninth grade biology teacher. It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too, Shuuichi. But I suggest looking at someone’s hand before you shake them.” Kokichi broke into a run, a “nishishi” following him as he disappeared down the hall.

Shuuichi looked down at his hand and peeled off the sticky green slime with a grimace. He could recognize the substance as Borax with a bit of glue and food coloring mixed into it. Nothing his students haven’t brought into his classroom before. He tossed it into a trash can before walking back to the copy room. His head spun as he thought over what had just happened.

What had the previous SPIRE teachers been fired for? Why did they think he and Kokichi would make appropriate replacements? Who exactly was Kokichi? How had Shuuichi never heard of him prior to today?

His thoughts were interrupted when he stepped into the copy room and was smacked in the face with a handful of papers.

“Here are the copies,” Maki said, releasing the papers when Shuuichi got a good grip on them. “What did the headmaster want you for?”

Shuuichi stumbled back a few steps before sighing and answering, “He wanted me to be a SPIRE teacher with Mr. Ouma, apparently. I don’t know why—”

“Mr. Ouma?”

“Yeah—”

“Goodbye.” She walked out of the room and shut the door behind her.

Shuuichi stared after her disappearing figure before sighing and heading back to his own room.

His questions weren’t answered and by the looks of it, they wouldn’t be answered anytime soon.

 

* * *

 

 

The news was around the school in an instant. By the time Shuuichi stepped into his own classroom before school started, two familiar figures were already there.

“Um…” Shuuichi raised an eyebrow at them. “Hi?”

Kaede’s face brightened, and she jumped down from the table she was seated on top of. “See? I told you! I told you they would make you the new SPIRE teacher!”

“Uh—”

“Dude! Why didn’t you tell us?” Kaito asked, slinging an arm around Shuuichi’s neck and ruffling his hair. “How come I had to find out from the art teacher? I barely talk to her.”

Shuuichi’s face paled. “Miss Yonaga? How did it make it to her?”

Kaede’s gaze flickered up in thought. “Maki told me, I told Rantarou, Rantarou told Miu, Miu told Tsumugi, Tsumugi told Angie, and Angie told Kaito.” She pursed her lips. “And I’m pretty sure Kaito told a bunch of other people.”

“What can I say? I’m proud of my sidekick,” Kaito said as he released Shuuichi from his grip.

“T-Thanks?” Shuuichi stammered before stumbling his way to his desk, almost dropping the cup of coffee in his hands. His heart pounded in his chest so fast he felt as if it could explode at any moment. “Class is about to start soon. You two should go.”

Kaede pouted but walked towards the door. “Fine, fine. Have fun in class today.”

“You too. Try not to burst out in Rachmaninoff piano concertos again.”

Kaito narrowed his eyes at them with an unspoken question, to which Kaede only giggled and exited the classroom. He raised his hand in farewell before following after her.

Finally, Shuuichi was allowed a moment to lean back in his seat and close his eyes for the last bit of peace in the morning before class started. His breathing slowed to a calm, consistent pace, and everything felt right with the world.

Then a student hurtled into his classroom, knocking him out of his peaceful trance, and screamed, “You’re teaching with Mr. Ouma next year?”

Suddenly, Shuuichi didn’t look so forward to the last month of school as he previously had.


	2. Intriguing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHOS BACK AFTER 2 MONTHS its me im sorry  
> mention of tenmiko this chapter  
> thanks to tackycrows for being a super awesome beta

Three months of summer had passed before the first day of school approached again, and Shuuichi was not prepared (At least, it was the first day of school for teachers. Students came the next day. Though Shuuichi would admit he was not prepared for that either).

Balancing working with the biology department of a detective agency and planning out the next school year with a teacher he barely knew wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be. While he anticipated seeing all his new students and possibly even being visited by his former students, all of that could come crumbling down if he or Kokichi didn’t stick to their plan.

Speaking of Kokichi, they hadn’t done much talking over the summer other than what was required for their classes. A quick overview of their email history together showed that Kokichi’s writing style was informal, but he was reluctant to divulge any information about himself. 

But it’s not like Shuuichi could blame him. His responses to Kokichi’s emails were so stiff and formal he cringed looking back at it. Before he could beat himself up too much, his phone buzzed on the nightstand next to him.

**Dr. Akamatsu:** r u still awake?

Alarms rang in Shuuichi’s head when the time shown on the header of his phone read midnight, but that didn’t stop him from responding.

**Shuuichi:** yeah. Cant sleep  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** shuuichi are u worrying yourself over ur new position again?  
**Shuuichi:** … maybe

And with that, Kaede went into what Shuuichi and his friends called “pep talk mode,” where she spammed his phone with inspirational quotes and motivational speeches. But he didn’t mind. It was a nice reminder that no matter how many things changed this year, one thing would always be a constant.

**Shuuichi:** haha i get it itll be fine  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** good!!! Never doubt yourself shuuichi!!  
**Shuuichi:** really, thank you. It helps  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** no problem! Now i have to get chopin to bed, excuse me  
**Shuuichi:** i still cant believe you actually named your dog chopin  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** i cant believe rantarou actually let me name our dog chopin  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** our next dogs name is gonna be liszt  
**Shuuichi:** kaede no  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** KAEDE YES  
**Dr. Akamatsu:** Hey, Mr. Saihara, this is Dr. Amami. Kaede drank a bit too much and fell down the stairs. She’s fine, just a bit disoriented, but I’m not too sure about she’ll do well with the hangover tomorrow ;). I’ve taken her phone for tonight so she doesn’t drunk-text anyone about which composers look like twinks again (Spending too much time around Miu does that to you). Have a nice night!

A chuckle rumbled in Shuuichi’s throat as he responded.

**Shuuichi:** understood. Goodnight to you too

Now that he thought about it, a lot of his friends were married, just like Kaede and Rantarou. He had been best man at Maki and Kaito’s wedding a few years ago. It seemed as if Tenko’s crush on Himiko was one-sided, but they had actually been married since before Shuuichi came to the school. Those were only the couples Shuuichi knew about, and he lived under a rock concerning these topics.

Briefly, Shuuichi wondered if his new co-teacher was in a relationship.

But that wasn’t his place to wonder. He banished the thoughts from his mind and shut his phone off, setting it on his nightstand before rolling over to sleep.

He stayed awake for another agonizing hour.

 

* * *

 

Hope’s Peak Academy was exactly the same as Shuuichi had left it, the only difference being the cleaner floors and quieter hall. Still, the buzz of excitement and anticipation for the new school year was unmistakable among the teachers present at the school.

The first group was stationed at the front desk, where Headmaster Naegi and the secretary, Kyouko Kirigiri, chatted over a cup of coffee. Treasurer Byakuya Togami sat near them with his face hidden with a newspaper as if he wasn’t paying attention to their words, but his ear was carefully positioned to pick up as much sound as possible. A few other staff, Touko the librarian and Aoi the counselor, occasionally chimed in with their own thoughts. From the outside, it seemed as if it was supposed to be a serious meeting between the faculty, but the smiles on their faces said otherwise.

Shuuichi slipped past them, his next destination being the teacher’s lounge.

The couch inside the teacher’s lounge was occupied by three people: Hajime Hinata, the AP statistics teacher, and two other people Shuuichi didn’t recognize. The person on Hajime’s left, a man with wild white hair wearing a green jacket, held a book in his hands and rambled about the themes and symbols in it as if he were giving a lecture to a student. Another person, a woman with pink hair, dozed on the end of the couch.

“Nagito,” Hajime started, his voice low, “I know you’re the AP literature teacher and you’re practicing for your classes, but if you say another word about Faulkner, I’m going to fling you into the ocean.”

The woman snapped awake and turned to frown at him. “Hajime, that’s rude.”

Nagito tilted his head, though his attempt at stifling an amused smile failed. “It’s alright, Chiaki, I’m just getting the behavior I deserve.”

Hajime’s nose scrunched, and he looked as if he were about to scold him before catching sight of Shuuichi by the coffee machine. “Oh, hey, Shuuichi. Have you discussed the debate club with Kaede yet?”

“No, but I think the captain’s a senior, so she didn’t graduate yet,” Shuuichi said. “Isn’t she in your class this year?”

“... Oh, right.”

Besides that lapse in memory, Hajime had proved to be an admirable sponsor of the debate club. Shuuichi and Kaede served as co-sponsors, and the three became close through managing the club together.

Still, Shuuichi knew not to interfere with whatever was going on between the three on the couch. He grabbed his cup of coffee and bid them goodbye before heading up the stairs to the second floor.

Shuuichi fished a key out of his pocket and unlocked the door to his classroom. He set his belongings down at his desk to take a moment to look around.

Everything was still in place as it had been three months ago. The laminated biology posters were still torn at the edges, but the student models he had gathered over the years remained pristine on top of the cabinets, where they stood untouched. Chairs were stacked on top of the tables. It didn’t seem like he had left at all.

But he couldn’t spend all day fawning over the state of his room. He had work to do.

Shuuichi grabbed the black marker off the sill of the whiteboard wrote tomorrow’s date on the top right side of the board. Under it, he wrote “Introduction and classroom rules” as the agenda for that day, and his and Kokichi’s names went on the middle of the board in different colors.

Thud. Thud.

Shuuichi’s eyebrows furrowed. He turned to stare at the wall connecting his and Kokichi’s classroom.

It seemed as if the sound was coming from the next room, but Shuuichi still had to set up his classroom for tomorrow. He opted to ignore the sound and take a folder out of his bag.

But the sound continued even as Shuuichi read over his copy of lab safety procedures and the rules of the classroom he and Kokichi had agreed on over the summer. 

Thud, thud, thud.

_ Thud, thud, thud. _

Annoying.

Shuuichi sighed and set his papers down before getting up from his seat and opening the door to Kokichi’s classroom. “Hey, could you please—What are you doing?”

Three people, each one familiar to a certain degree, stood guilty in front of him, averting their eyes and giving him a nervous smile.

Shuuichi moved his disappointed gaze to the tallest of the three. “Rantarou, I had faith in you. Aren’t you supposed to be the responsible one?”

Rantarou chuckled and scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah, but when you put me, Miu, and Kokichi together, none of us are responsible. That’s why we’re called the disaster trio, after all.”

“... No, you’re not.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Is anyone going to answer my question? What were you guys doing?”

“We were just conducting a little science experiment of our own,” Kokichi said, his voice lilting innocently. “You’re a science teacher. You should know we were just curious.”

Shuuichi gave him a dubious look. “You were conducting a science experiment, not with a science teacher, but with the AP human geography teacher…”

Rantarou gave him a tight smile.

“The calculus teacher…”

Miu whistled and looked away, twirling a strand of hair around her finger.

“And the language arts teacher?"

Kokichi smiled back at him. “Yup!”

“With a bunsen burner, box of tissues, ceramic cup, and a box of wires? Where did you even get the bunsen burner?”

“Yes.”

This was really the teacher Shuuichi had to work with for the rest of the year?

Shuuichi sighed and shook his head. “Alright, I guess. While I’m still here, I have to ask this. What’s your teaching style, Mr. Ouma? Do you—”

“First of all, don’t call me that,” Kokichi said, “Just call me by my first name. It sounds weird when an adult calls me by my last name. And I guess I lecture and print out a bunch of follow-along notes.”

“... Oh. I see—”

“That was a lie. I use a ton of slideshows the other language arts teachers and I create.”

“Really?"

“No. That was another lie.”

Shuuichi frowned and looked at Rantarou and Miu.

Miu raised her palms. “Hey, don’t look at us. We don’t have any answers for what the hell that stupid twink is thinking.”

“I guess you’re just gonna have to figure it out yourself,” Kokichi said, ignoring Miu completely. His eyes glinted with mischief. “You’re a detective during the summer, right? You can figure it out.”

Then Shuuichi regretted every decision that brought him to the moment when he realized he shouldn’t have revealed so much information about himself. “There’s a difference between being a detective and working with detectives.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Miu, hand me that cable.”

Miu leaned over a table to pick up a black cable off the ground, and Shuuichi chose that moment to exit the room and return to his own classroom. He closed the door behind him with a sigh.

This was going to be a long year.

 

* * *

 

The first day of school came all too soon. After greeting his coworkers and making coffee in a thermos in the teacher’s lounge, Shuuichi walked into his classroom, taking deep breaths.

_ It’s okay, Shuuichi, you rehearsed this introduction a bunch of times before. You’ve memorized it, the students are more scared than you are, it’s gonna be— _

“Shuuichi! Good morning!”

Shuuichi turned to the man standing at his door and smiled. “Good morning, Kokichi. Did you get a good night’s sleep?”

Kokichi’s grin faded, and he redirected his gaze to his fingernails. “God, that was a boring question. Can you ask something more exciting?”

“Um…”

“Here, I’ll do it for you.” He locked eyes with him with the most serious face Shuuichi’s ever seen on him. “Are you nervous?”

Shuuichi blinked, caught off guard. His heart pounded at the sudden accusation. “I, um… Yeah, I guess so. Just a little bit.”

“Do you think you can hide it in front of the students?”

“Yeah, probably, I’ve been doing it for years. And frankly, it’s a bit insulting to have someone question my competence.”

Kokichi’s eyes widened, and what he had just said processed in Shuuichi’s head.

“I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to let that slip, that was completely unprofe—”

“Well, looks like this year won’t be so boring after all,” Kokichi purred, holding a finger to a mysterious smirk. Unlike the anger Shuuichi expected, his voice carried a hint of amusement, as if he was playing a game with him. “I’ll see you in a few minutes,  _ Mr. Saihara. _ ” And with that, he clicked the door shut to return to his own room.

After he was sure he was gone, Shuuichi leaned back in his seat and let out a long sigh. He moved to brush his hair to the side, only to find sweat drops collected on his forehead. He wasn’t sure Kokichi was someone he could ever wrap his head around, but he couldn’t give up on his co-teacher now.

It was three minutes into the first day of school, and he was already stressed. This was no way to greet his students.

So Shuuichi wiped the rest of the sweat off his forehead and drank a long sip of the coffee in his mug, gearing up for the long day ahead of him.

 

* * *

 

Shuuichi stood at his opened door, offering a gentle smile to the students passing by and the shy freshmen reluctantly stepping into his classroom after double-checking their printed schedules. Across the hall was Kaito, who welcomed every student into his room with a high-five. Tsumugi was stationed in the room next to him despite their subjects being wildly different (physics and applied design didn’t go together, as far as Shuuichi knew), and he was reminded of how confusing it must be to navigate the school as freshmen. Shuuichi offered her a smile, and Tsumugi offered one back.

Kokichi stood at his door right a few feet in front of Shuuichi. He greeted every student with a warm smile and handshake before redirecting them into Shuuichi’s classroom. It was jarring to see him so caring with his students, but Shuuichi supposed that was who he was as a teacher.

It took until the bell rang for every student to cram into Shuuichi’s classroom, and even then they had to allow a few stragglers in. Shuuichi stood in front of his desk calling roll while Kokichi sat on a nearby counter. Once he was done, Kokichi jumped down from the counter.

“Welcome, everyone!” Kokichi cheered, scanning the crowd of expectant faces. “How was getting lost in the school?”

Silence.

“Wow, tough crowd. Well, I’m Mr. Ouma, and I’ll be your SPIRE language arts teacher for the year. We’ll just go over the supply list to start.” He pulled a scroll of paper from the sleeve of his shirt and cleared his throat, earning a giggle from a few of the students. “You’ll need a binder, five divider tabs, obviously pencils, colored pencils, and a great attitude! Last one’s optional but preferred.”

Shuuichi watched Kokichi as he continued to read off the classroom rules and language arts syllabus, clicking through a powerpoint on the projector as he did so. Kokichi walked across the front of the room as if it was his stage and he was made for it. A joke here and there or the occasional laugh gave him the undivided attention of the crowd watching his every move.

Shuuichi raised a hand to his mouth, thinking.  _ Kokichi definitely has a lot of stage presence, and he gets a ton of attention by seeming like he doesn’t take himself too seriously. I doubt it would work with seniors, but with scared freshmen… _

“Hey! Mr. Saihara! Stay awake!”

Shuuichi snapped out of his trance, only to see everyone else looking at him expectantly. He cleared his thoughts and offered them an apologetic smile. “Ah, sorry. I’m not out of summer mode yet.” Once the giggles faded away, he continued. “I’m Mr. Saihara, and I will be your SPIRE biology teacher for the year. Here’s some lab safety rules to start off the year.”

The first few rules went smoothly as Shuuichi tried to incorporate more movement into his lecture. Once he reached the edge of his classroom, he took a beaker out from a cabinet and held it out. “This is a glass test tube. We won’t be using a ton of these since we don’t do a lot of labs in here, but make sure to hold it by the lips and—”

Crash!

Shuuichi froze, not daring to look down at the shattered pieces gathered at his feet. He made eye contact with a seemingly equally horrified Kokichi.

Then Kokichi stepped into action. “Quick! You dropped a glass object! What do you do first?”

A student raised their hand, face passive as they waited for Kokichi to call on them. “Get everyone to clear the area, then tell the teacher.”

“Correct! Great demonstration, Mr. Saihara. Now, clear the area so I can clean it up,” Kokichi said. He shot a wink at him before heading into the closet in the back of the room to grab a broom.

Shuuichi urged the students a few feet away from the mess before returning to reading the lab safety procedures, willing the adrenaline away.

The rest of the day went smoothly. They had managed to pass out the syllabus and lab safety contracts in time before the bell rang. Though they avoided another accident in their next two classes, the broken test tube remained in his head until their last class was dismissed.

Kokichi chugged from his water bottle and stretched his arms out. “Nice use of situational irony, Mr. Saihara! I couldn’t have taught it better myself.”

Shuuichi sighed and collapsed on his chair behind his desk. “I’m so sorry about that, I didn’t mean for that to happen. And test tubes have gotten super expensive, too…”

“So what are we gonna do tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah. We did all the housekeeping things today, so we definitely need to start teaching tomorrow. I already arranged the home base list for the students. You like the colors yellow and orange?”

“Um… sure.”

“Good. And I know you’re doing the whole macromolecule thing, so…”

“Oh, right.” Shuuichi cleared his throat and flipped his lesson plan binder open to a page with neat writing and arrows. “I was planning on making copies of this worksheet today and taking them through everything they need to know by writing on the board. Then I was going to make copies of these articles, give a different one to every four people, and split them into groups so they can share what they learned. Does that sound okay?”

Kokichi scanned through the page in the lesson planner. “Anything I need to know for my class?”

“Be sure to emphasize that proteins have enzymes since that’s what we’re learning next. Nucleic acid isn’t as important, but it still needs to be mentioned for the genetics unit.”

Kokichi stuck his bottom lip out, and tears welled in his eyes. “You’re so unfair, Shuuichi, what are my kids gonna do with a useless language arts teacher? Wah!” He burst into a round of loud tears.

Shuuichi tensed at the sound of crying and immediately scrambled to reassure him otherwise. “D-Don’t worry about it. They’re going to be combining in the second half of class, so they can just ask me if they have any questions.”

The tears stopped as quickly as they came, and Kokichi gave him a blank stare. “I know. I was kidding.”

“... Oh.”

“You can’t even tell when I’m lying? Jeez, you’re the worst coworker ever,” Kokichi said, “You should make it up to me by making all the copies yourself.”

“That… That was the plan anyway.”

Kokichi yawned as he picked up his laptop and papers. “I’ll be in the downstairs C pod doing my work. Bye!”

Shuuichi furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait, why not your own room?”

“It’s boring,” was all Kokichi got out before leaving the classroom.

Shuuichi blinked.

As unexpected as that was, the only thing he could do was move on. So he opened up his email account and started on an email to the school about replacing the broken test tube.

 

* * *

 

“... And that’s all that happened today,” Shuuichi said to a table of his friends.

The other three murmured in concern over a cup of varying beverages.

It was tradition for Shuuichi and the friends he had made at the school to go out for dinner after the first day of school, and this year was no exception. The place they ate at switched every year, this year’s meeting being at a casual restaurant a few blocks down from the school.

“That’s crazy,” Kaede said, “At least your coworker covered for you, right?”

Shuuichi smiled and brought the cup of coffee closer to him. “Yeah… I’m glad he stepped in, or that could’ve been a disaster.”

“Which coworker are we talking about?” Maki asked.

“Oh, um… Mr. Ouma.”

“Oh, my brother,” Kaito said with a smile.

Shuuichi choked on the nonexistent coffee in his throat, clutching his chest and coughing. He felt Kaede patting his back, but that didn’t matter at the moment. He looked back up to meet Kaito’s eyes. “H-He’s your  _ brother ? ” _

“Oh. Have I never mentioned it to you?”

“No!"

“Well, I am now.”

Now that he thought about it, the only other person with natural purple hair other than Kaito or Kokichi was the nurse, Mikan, but her appearance was as different from them as it could get. Meanwhile, if he thought about it, the two really did look similar…

Shuuichi furrowed his eyebrows. “We’re right across the hall from each other. Why don’t you guys greet each other or anything?”

Kaito shrugged and took a swig of his drink. “Eh, he’s a little shit, and neither of us like getting into arguments in front of our students. You saw that little shit side of him, right?”

“Yeah, but… okay.” He turned to Maki. “Maki, I thought you knew I was working with Mr. Ouma.”

“I did, I just didn’t see the point in mentioning that part to other people,” Maki said, twirling the straw in her drink. She huffed when her eyes fell on the menu. “Can we order now? We’ve just been talking for ten minutes.”

Kaede called a waiter to their table. After reciting their orders, she turned back to Shuuichi with her hands clasped together on the table. “So, how do you think this year will go?”

Shuuichi paused to think, holding a hand over his mouth. Finally, he looked up with a smile. “Honestly? I thought it wouldn’t go well at first, but after today, I think it’ll be a good year.”

“Glad to hear it.”

 

* * *

 

“Ugh, did you really have to drag me and that dumb blonde bitch fabric-shopping with you?” Kokichi whined, leaning against Tsumugi’s arm.

Tsumugi hummed as she gently pushed him off. “Which one? Miu or Hiyoko?”

“The one with us right now.”

“You know, I can hear you guys talking shit about me,” Miu called from behind them.

“Whatever. I wanna go home.”

“You mean  _ our _ home.”

“Yuck. It’s not home when you’re in there, too.”

“Why, you little—”

“Guys,” Tsumugi sighed. She stopped in front of a flower pattern, reaching up to touch it before wrinkling her nose and retracting her hand. “I just need to get some fabric before drama club starts. I don’t need you two to get us kicked out of a fabric shop again.”

The two quieted down, though they still kicked each other when Tsumugi looked away.

Sharing an apartment with someone was stressful enough. Sharing an apartment with a best friend that happened to share the same occupation and worked in the same school as you was bound to cause some tension, and Tsumugi was glad she wasn’t part of that arrangement. But despite their many,  _ many _ arguments, Kokichi and Miu’s fourteen-year friendship was still going strong.

“I’m not even in your damn drama club, I run robotics,” Miu mumbled, kicking at the floor like a pouting child.

Tsumugi reached up to feel another piece of fabric. “Maybe, but Kokichi and I are, and Hiyoko would kick you if she heard you talking bad about her club. Oh, speaking of Kokichi…” She dropped her hand back on the handle of the shopping cart and turned to him. “You still haven’t told us how your first day went other than your co-teacher dropped a test tube while he was demonstrating lab safety.”

Kokichi snickered at the memory. “Yeah, that happened. You wanna try guessing who the lucky—”

“You’re co-teaching with Mr. Saihara, don’t even try to lie to me.”

“You’re no fun, Tsumugi.” He pouted and elbowed Miu. “Come on, back me up here.”

Miu elbowed him back. “The only backing up you’re gonna get is you backing your ass into the ocean if you don’t stop—”

“What do you think of him so far?” Tsumugi asked, wedging herself in between the two in an effort to stop any further arguments.

Kokichi wrinkled his nose. “Absolutely horrible. Bad teacher. I hate him.”

“Jesus, drop the lies for two seconds,” Miu said, rolling her eyes. “Here, I’ll translate. ‘I actually really respect Suckhara as a teacher and look forward to the rest of the year with him.’” She cackled as Kokichi whined and half-heartedly threw punches at her arm.

Tsumugi giggled, making sure to keep her laughter quiet in the empty store. “I’m sure you’re right, but let’s hear it from the man himself. How do you feel, Kokichi?”

Kokichi sighed and crossed his arms, but not before shooting a cross look at Miu. “... He’s more interesting than I thought he would be, I’ll give you that. I’m still kinda mad I don’t get to teach as many books as I did, though.”

“You’re just pissed you don’t get to hold your annual book burnings,” Miu snickered.

Kokichi moved to kick her shin and laughed as both of them were subsequently scolded by Tsumugi.

Still, even with everything that had happened today, Kokichi couldn’t help but feel as if it was going to be a good year.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sponsors: at my school, every club needs a teacher as a sponsor
> 
> Home base: students in the yellow home base go into one classroom and students in the orange home base go into the other classroom.
> 
> Combining classes: basically students in both classes are doing the same activity and are allowed to go in and out of both Ouma and Saihara's rooms when they normally need to stick to their own room
> 
> Brothers: i originally wasnt gonna add this in but im now stuck on the ouma and momota are brothers headcanon. i blame my friend. you know who you are... ;)
> 
> thanks for reading! let me know if you have any questions :)


	3. Failed Prototype

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to tackycrows for betaing <3

The first two weeks of school went as smoothly as two co-teachers new to teaching a course could make it. That is, even through forgetting some of the students’ names and on one occasion needing to consult the curriculum for a question Shuuichi didn’t quite know the answer to, the two had managed to adapt well to their new class system.

But with clubs starting up in the next few weeks, planning for the first informational meeting was taking up more time than it should.

“Okay, we started off with Lincoln-Douglas debate, so we’re definitely keeping that,” Hajime said.

Kaede furrowed her eyebrows. “That’s not the question. We’re asking if we can afford to keep public forum debate. We only have three teachers, after all. That’s only three judges.”

“... Probably not, but a lot of students liked public forum. We should keep it.”

After thirty minutes of nonstop debate in Hajime’s classroom, the three had gotten nowhere close to a compromise. And between all the math terms and graphs hung up on the walls and the frustration of not being heard, Shuuichi was just about ready to walk out of the classroom and backwards into hell.

“I-If I can speak,” Shuuichi said, internally praising the world when the other two finally stopped talking and listened. “Entering competitions costs money. We know that. We also know that getting adults to volunteer as judges cuts our costs for entering. If we can get a good number of people to be judges, we should be able to enter both debate types into competition.”

Hajime paused, flipping his pen in thought. “Maybe, but we only had two other judges last time.”

“Hey, don’t be such a pessimist,” Kaede said, laughing as she nudged his arm. “I’m sure this year will be different.”

“We didn’t get any new teachers this year, though. That reduces our chances that someone is interested.”

“That’s true… but look at what Ren told us!”

Shuuichi snapped out of his self-pity and shot her a bemused expression. “Ren said something about that to you?”

Ren was the student leader of the debate club and was the one who first reached out to Hajime to start it. While she and Shuuichi didn’t hold any bad blood towards each other, they definitely weren’t as close as she was with the other two sponsors. Shuuichi blamed that on him missing so many meetings and the fact that he only joined the club a few years ago, but he still couldn’t help but feel guilty.

“Oh, right, you had a meeting with the science department then.” Kaede leaned on the desk, tapping her cheek with a finger. “She said something about asking Miss Nevermind, Mr. Ouma, and a few other teachers about it, but they just didn’t get enough prior notice. Miss Nevermind had to oversee a foreign language event at the school, and Mr. Ouma had a club meeting.”

“Kokichi runs a club?” Shuuichi asked.

“Yeah. He runs two.”

Shuuichi pursed his lips, suddenly uncomfortable with how much he didn’t know about his co-teacher. “Oh.”

This was alarming, at best. Shuuichi had already told Kokichi about the debate club, which met every other Thursday. If Kokichi ran two clubs, that increased the chances of their schedules not working to check up on each other. But most of all, it was just plain ignorant. How could he not know something as simple as who sponsored which club?

“Getting back to the original topic,” Hajime said, “Let’s allow both Lincoln-Douglas and public forum, then we’ll see how many people are willing to volunteer. If we don’t get enough volunteers, we’ll just have to take the top students and send them to competition.”

“I assume we’re following normal distribution?” Kaede giggled.

Hajime stood up and walked towards the door, though his attempts at hiding his own amused smile failed. “I am so done with statistics today. I don’t need your input,  _ Dr. Akamatsu. _ ”

“Oh, so you would prefer to have control over the output?”

And with that, he walked out of the classroom, shutting the door behind him. A few seconds passed before he stepped back into the classroom to two laughing coworkers, and another few seconds followed before he joined them.

 

* * *

 

With the time poured into making sure the club runs smoothly, it was a matter of time before something went wrong. To be fair, it wasn’t as if someone had dropped a test tube again. No, the problem was staring him right in the face. Literally.

Shuuichi took another step into Kokichi’s classroom, furrowing his eyebrows as Kokichi stared back at him with an equally confused face. “Uh… I thought we were combining today.”

Kokichi fell silent and his face went blank. Just before Shuuichi moved to apologize and back off, he shot a grin at the students. “Juuust kidding, everyone! We’re doing the SOAP note tomorrow. Today, we’re combining to learn about cell organelles. You’re gonna get a worksheet, and you’ll follow the instructions on there. For this, I’ll give you some chalk, and you can draw on the tables. How exciting is that?”

The students murmured, intrigued at the prospect of drawing on the tables.

“After you’re done with one section, you’ll call either me or Mr. Saihara over to stamp your paper. If you want it to be quiet, go to Mr. Saihara’s room. If you feel like being chatty today, stick to my room.”

The students burst into conversation, but they accepted the task as Shuuichi passed out a worksheet and chalk. A few of the students walked into the other classroom, though most stayed where they were. Some students from Shuuichi’s room walked in as well.

After the students settled, Kokichi sent a strained smile his way. “Mr. Saihara, a word?”

The smile shot more fear down Shuuichi’s spine than a glare would have. The discrepancy between the strained smile and the murder in his eyes was more unnerving than the scariest horror movie he had ever watched. Nevertheless, he nodded and stepped out into the hallway with him.

The smile disappeared as soon as they were out of view of their students. “I thought we were doing the cell activity tomorrow,” Kokichi said.

Shuuichi fumbled for his words, averting his eyes. “I-I thought we were doing the SOAP note tomorrow… I sent an email to you about it, but you never answered.”

“I  _ did _ answer. But it was just an hour ago, so maybe you didn’t see it.” He sighed and set his hands on his hips. “You know what? We’ll talk about this later. I’m gonna go grab my stamp.” And with that, Kokichi stepped back into his classroom.

Shuuichi sighed and retreated back to his room to grab his own stamp.

Twenty minutes and one round of stamps later, Kokichi approached him more apprehensively than Shuuichi would’ve thought he was capable of being after the pseudo-scolding in the hallway.

“Hey,” Kokichi said, “Hypothetical question, but why does a plant have a cell wall?”

Shuuichi blinked. And blinked again. Then the question fully processed in his head, and he burst out laughing.

Kokichi pouted. “Hey, don’t laugh at me! That’s mean, Mr. Saihara!”

“I-I’m sorry, I just…” Shuuichi took another look at his face before another wave of laughter shook his body.

“Hmph. You have no right laughing when you made a grammar mistake on this. Science teachers write the worst worksheets.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Shuuichi took a deep breath, fanning himself with a hand to keep the heat away from his face. “Plant cells have a wall to keep their shape and rigidity. Animal cells don’t. That’s all you need to know about that. But weren’t you taught my subject in high school?”

“... Shut up.” Kokichi snatched a pen from Shuuichi’s shirt pocket with overdramatic flair before storming back to his own room.

A few chuckles bubbled up in Shuuichi’s throat before he realized the students around them were laughing at something else. He sighed and flung the door open to shout after him.

“Mr. Ouma! Can I have my pen back?”

All he got in return was a bubbly giggle.

 

* * *

 

Despite all the laughter they had shared that day, Shuuichi still found himself the victim of Kokichi’s intense stare after classes ended.

“Hey, we need to talk about what happened in second block today,” Kokichi said, his voice more level and calm than Shuuichi thought it was capable of being. His stare was cold and devoid of any emotion.

Shuuichi could’ve summoned any number of excuses (He had to refill his coffee, he had to copy a worksheet, he had a meeting), but the one that came out happened to be, “My, uh, neighbor is being investigated by the FBI. I need to go home to make sure I’m not involved in it.”

Kokichi blinked. His mind processed the words before he doubled over in hysterical laughter, going as far as wrapping his arms around his stomach. “Oh my god, that has  _ got _ to be the best lie I’ve ever heard. Really? Your neighbor is being investigated by the FBI?”

“I panicked, okay?”

“That was probably the worst lie anyone’s tried to tell me, and I live with Miu.” His face blanked. “But don’t try to lie to me. I hate liars.”

“Uh… but don’t you lie a lot?”

“Whatever. Just be sure to check your emails on time, and I’ll check my emails on time. If we both do that, there won’t be any problems.” Kokichi turned on his heel to walk away, but Shuuichi put a hand on his shoulder.

“Wait.”

Kokichi turned around and raised an eyebrow, peeling Shuuichi’s hand off his shoulder.

“W-Why don’t we just plan together?” Shuuichi said, “It’ll be more efficient, there won’t be any communication problems like that one, and neither of us have to waste time sorting through more emails. There’s really no downside to just sitting down and talking the lessons out in person.”

Kokichi froze. And just before Shuuichi opened his mouth to apologize, he sighed. “Fine, fine, if you’re that desperate to spend time with me. Jeez, Mr. Saihara, I didn’t know you would be so unprofessional that you ask me out on a date in this kind of way.”

“What? No, that’s not my intention at all. I’m sorry if it came off that—”

“I know. It was a joke.” He crossed his arms. “But I’m not joking about agreeing to plan with you. Do you want to plan in my room or your room?”

Shuuichi hummed in thought before grabbing his lesson planner off his desk. “Let’s just go to your room.”

“Ooh, getting me alone in my room? How bold of you.”

Shuuichi only nudged Kokichi’s shoulder aside, smiling at the following laughter.

 

* * *

 

Kokichi’s desk was much neater than Shuuichi had expected. An open laptop rested next to a stack of random papers he couldn’t quite identify. Several pictures sat on a low shelf, one with people who appeared to be his family and one with some of the teachers from the school. A white bottle holding some kind of purple liquid sat on a pink coaster. But even with all this information, Shuuichi still didn’t know his co-teacher as well as his co-teacher knew him, and that frustrated him to no end.

Thirty minutes passed before Shuuichi gathered the courage to ask about any of the items on his desk.

“So, um, that pink coaster looks nice. Where did you get it?”

Kokichi laughed. “I robbed a store for it, of course. Chain stores are so much easier to steal from than a store with staff who actually care.”

That didn’t sound quite right. There was no way the school would employ a thief as a teacher. Even if he wasn’t caught, he wouldn’t admit it so freely to someone who could turn him in at any moment.

“Was that… Was that a lie?” Shuuichi asked.

“What do you think, Shuuichi? Am I lying or not?”

Strangely, Kokichi didn’t seem too alarmed at being caught in his lie. In fact, his face brightened, and his eyes sparkled. It was almost like he wanted to be caught.

Shuuichi hummed, picking up his pen from his lesson planner and moving the end of it to support his chin. “I think you’re lying.”

“Bingo!” Kokichi cheered. “Finally, you used that pretty little head of yours for once. Can’t say the same thing for a few people in this school. Anyway, are you planning on having your lab on Tuesday or Wednesday? I want to fit in a Socratic seminar sometime soon.”

“I’m having the lab on Tuesday, and all the work is due on Friday.”

“Okay, then the socratic seminar is on Wednesday.”

They continued working together for some time before the clock hit four o’clock and the alarm on Shuuichi’s phone went off.

Kokichi wrinkled his nose. “Classical music? What are you, some kind of grandpa?”

“Hey, classical music isn’t just for old people,” Shuuichi said as he scrambled to shut his alarm off. “What do  _ you _ have as your alarm?”

“Heavy metal. Miss Mioda would approve.”

Then Kokichi’s phone rang, blasting a cutesy instrumental song. His face heated up as Shuuichi chuckled, but he grabbed the phone and turned away. 

“Kaito, what the fuck? I’m at a meeting right now!” Kokichi hissed under his breath. He waited for a response Shuuichi didn’t hear. “No, I didn’t forget about dinner together. Who do you think I am? Wait. Don’t answer that.” His hums of agreement were separated by long stretches of silence before he frowned and hung up the phone.

“Who was that?” Shuuichi asked, knowing full well who it was.

Kokichi rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry about it.”

“That was your brother, right?”

“No, it was just a random telemarketer. I think Miu sent my phone number to a bunch of spam companies again. I swear, one day, I’m gonna—”

“But you mentioned Kaito, and Kaito’s your brother,” Shuuichi blurted. He clamped a hand over his mouth when Kokichi’s eyes widened. “S-Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. Let’s just forget—”

“Who told you that?” Kokichi asked with his cheeks puffed out in a pout. “Just because we both have purple hair doesn’t mean we’re brothers. I don’t know why everyone keeps thinking that.”

“Um… Kaito told me, actually.”

Kokichi’s face blanked, then he turned and shot a disinterested glance at his fingernails. “Ah. That idiot. I guess there’s no point lying to you anymore.” He straightened his back and fixed his gaze on Shuuichi. “Yup, we’re brothers. I don’t know how I’m related to someone as stupid as him, but…”

“But I’ve never seen you two speaking to each other.”

“Well, yeah. Neither of us particularly like being punched in the face in front of our students,” Kokichi snorted, rolling his eyes.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“I can already tell you’re an only child with that attitude.”

Shuuichi opened his mouth to refute, only to remember there was really no argument he could use to deflect a true accusation. “You’re right, I guess.”

They continued talking as they packed up their supplies. Their conversation had turned from Shuuichi’s family to his friends to how lost he was when he first entered the school. Their laughter echoed through the halls, and they separated when they reached the parking lot.

It was only when Shuuichi was driving home when he realized Kokichi had turned the conversation away from himself again, and he still knew next to nothing about the enigma that was his co-teacher.

 

* * *

 

“Kaito, you stupid fuck, did you seriously tell Shuuichi that we’re brothers?”

Kaito raised an eyebrow and set his fork down. “I was literally just talking about a football game, but okay, we can talk about that, too.”

The two were stationed in the kitchen of Kokichi’s apartment, each holding a bowl of spaghetti in one hand and a pair of wooden chopsticks in the other. A children’s show that Miu had forgotten to turn off was still audible (Kokichi made a mental note to scold her later, though considering who Miu was, he wasn’t sure about the effectiveness of his plan). Kaito kicked his door open thirty minutes earlier with a box of noodles and a jar of marinara sauce in his arms, only to meet Kokichi’s despairful gaze at the resulting crack in the wall.

Sadly for the apartment, this was a common occurrence (common enough for Kokichi to install a rubber bumper where the doorknob meets the wall, at least). But despite that, neither of the two were willing to give up their already rare meetings with each other, especially since there was nowhere else they could speak without feeling the need to lie about their familial status.

“I mean, he mentioned you in conversation,” Kaito said around a mouthful of pasta. “I felt like he should know since he’s your co-teacher and everything.”

Kokichi rolled his eyes. “Just because he’s my co-teacher doesn’t mean he has to know everything about me.”

“Knowing that your brother is his friend is not knowing everything about you. God, can you chill about that for once? Why’re you so paranoid?”

“It’s not paranoia if they’re really out to get you.”

“That’s it, you’ve been spending way too much time around Tsumugi,” Kaito groaned.

“You were the one who recognized the trope.”

Kaito sighed and mixed the noodles deeper into the marinara sauce in his bowl. “You can’t keep running away from people forever.”

Kokichi bristled. “I’m not running away, I have friends now. I have Miu, Tsumugi, Rantarou—”

“Bro, it took fucking forever for you to warm up to them.”

Kokichi’s mouth snapped shut.

It was true, and both of them knew it. Kokichi had met Miu in elementary school, so they had multiple decades to adjust to each other. The other two, however, received the brunt of his distrust and worked hard to wriggle through his defenses. Even then, they still didn’t know everything about him. And although nobody would ever voice it, it was painful to watch him retreat into his shell of lies and keep his guard up like a porcupine with too many quills.

Kokichi sighed. “Just leave it, Kaito. I know what I’m doing.”

“... Fine, if you say so.”

The two had many differences between them, but the ultimate truth that bound them together was that Kokichi did not, in fact, have any clue what he was doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lincoln-Douglas debate: a type of formal debate focused on philosophy and ethics
> 
> Public Forum debate: a type of formal debate with an emphasis on controversial topics ~~this is the type of debate i used to do actually~~
> 
> SOAP Note: the worst assignment in my life. SOAP (subjective, objective, assessment, and plan) notes are methods of documentation to write out notes about a patient. the issue was when they expected a bunch of high schoolers to be able to write it like healthcare professionals about a topic they didnt teach us about. yes im still bitter
> 
> Neighbor being investigated by FBI: a teacher told us that she might be looking at her phone and watch bc her neighbor was busted by the FBI for something and she didn't know what was going on. so uh. not a lie on her part, but definitely a lie on Saihara's part
> 
> thanks for reading! please let me know if you have any questions (☞ﾟヮﾟ)☞


	4. Partner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI GUYS GUESS WHOS BACK  
> sorry
> 
> s/o to the saiouma teacher au server for giving me the inspiration to kickstart this again. yall are great. and s/o to the people still reading this in 2019 bc god damn this is ancient.

Another day, another heaping helping of caffeine as he walked up the stairs to his room.

Shuuichi yawned as he unlocked the door to his classroom. He didn’t remember making the trip from his home to the school or making the coffee in the first place, but he supposed there was no point in trying to remember now, even with the attention boost from the caffeine.

He flicked the lights on and squinted at the sudden light. Everything from the student models to his desk was the same with one exception…

_ I don’t remember putting my projector down. When did I do that? _

Nevertheless, Shuuichi set his belongings down on his desk before lifting the projector back to its proper place, revealing neat, blue writing.

_ “Two blood cells met and fell in love. But alas, it was all in vein.” _

Shuuichi had heard many,  _ many _ biology jokes throughout his years of living. He could recall a student in the library being smacked in the face with a textbook after they recited this exact line and sympathizing with the smacker. But now, at seven in the morning, tired from staying up grading…

He laughed.

And he laughed harder.

Then he doubled over in laughter, his giggles growing louder and louder with each second. For once, his troubles from last night were forgotten, and his heart jumped with delight. It felt as if nothing could bring him down.

“I see you saw the joke on your board.”

Shuuichi managed to keep his laughter down to check who was leaning in his doorway. “Good morning, Kokichi. I take it you wrote it?”

Kokichi scrunched his nose. “Ew! You really take me as the kind of person to write crappy jokes on your board? No way.”

“Well… a little birdy told me you were looking up puns online.” A blatant lie, though Shuuichi was certain the handwriting on the board matched Kokichi’s handwriting in his lesson planner.

For a moment, Kokichi’s eyes widened the slightest bit as if he was caught with his hand in a cookie jar before he pouted. “And a little birdy told me you shouldn’t be lying to the ultimate liar. Really, I thought you had more respect for me, Mr. Saihara.” He huffed and made his dramatic exit.

“Thank you!” Shuuichi shouted after him, his words punctuated by a giggle.

The footsteps stopped for just one moment before continuing, and Shuuichi felt as if he finally made progress with the mystery he wanted to solve.

 

* * *

 

The day started with Kokichi walking into his classroom in the middle of Shuuichi’s first class with crossed arms and tight lips. He marched up to the board, giving Shuuichi the shoulder check without so much as a glance, and turned towards the students.

Shuuichi stood by the side, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

There can be no life without a balance of good and bad. With all the progress he had been making with his class and co-teacher, it was no wonder  _ something _ bad smacked them in the face with adequate warning they had ignored. That being said, this interruption definitely wasn’t planned nor expected.

Kokichi smiled at the students, though it was more strained than Shuuichi had ever seen it before. “Good morning, everyone! I’ve been reading through your narratives.”

A few of the students let out a nervous chuckle as everyone glanced at each other for any hint of what was to come.

“Here’s your basic grammar lesson for today.” He turned to the board and uncapped a marker, drawing a lowercase and capital letter next to each other. Finally, he turned to the waiting audience and pointed at the capital letter. “When you’re writing a narrative or any sort of writing really, use the uppercase I. Never use the lowercase I. I saw that on some of your narratives.”

Shuuichi locked eyes with him, his shoulders tensing as if asking,  _ “What gives?” _

“Just thought I would make an announcement,” Kokichi sang. And with that, he placed the marker back onto the board and exited the room, slamming the door shut behind him in a way that was innocuous to anyone other than Shuuichi.

Some of the students giggled and elbowed their sheepish friends, but the room was silent. It was the quietest Shuuichi had ever seen a room of ninth graders outside of an exam.

Shuuichi’s hand reached out in front of him before he returned it to his side with a frown.

 

* * *

“So what you’re telling me is Kokichi just randomly went into your classroom, taught a lesson on basic grammar, and stormed out without any context whatsoever?”

“Yes.”

“Yup. Sounds like him.”

Maybe Kaito wasn’t the right person to go for advice concerning Kokichi, but he was the only person Shuuichi felt comfortable asking for more information. It also probably wasn’t a good idea to have this conversation at night under the shitty lights of a shady convenience store at midnight. Too late now, though.

Kaito paused to dump a pack of markers into his basket. “Why is this bothering you so much? Just mind your business, and he’ll mind his own business.”

“Seeing as how we’re co-teachers, I think it’s important if a good number of students don’t know about something like basic grammar,” Shuuichi mumbled. His own basket was empty, and he found that whatever he had come to the store for was long forgotten.

“Yeah, but you seem a lot more concerned about Kokichi than anything.”

“Of course I am! What kind of person would I be if I didn’t at least care for my co-teacher a little?”

Kaito shrugged. “I mean, when I co-taught with Miu, we never really checked in with each other. We just kinda did our jobs and clocked out when we could.”

“Is that why that course was only available for one semester?”

“... Maybe.” He hesitated. “Okay, I wasn’t supposed to tell you this, but it’s kinda been a bad week for him. Tsumugi and Hiyoko were supposed to take the drama club on alternating weeks with him, but they’ve been too busy, so he’s managing the club every week. Miu’s out with the robotics club, so there’s no one in the house either.”

Shuuichi blinked. “So is he… is he just lonely?”

“How should I know?”

“You’re his brother!”

And with that, Kaito’s face fell, and Shuuichi mentally kicked himself.

“S-Sorry, that was uncalled for…”

Kaito cut him off with the shake of his head. “No, I know. We… didn’t really get along when we were younger. I’m trying to make up for it now—we’re both trying—it’s just not easy.”

Shuuichi bit his lip.

As an only child, there was no way he could accurately imagine how exactly Kaito felt about being so close yet so separated from his brother. But he was the one who had to listen to Shuuichi’s ramblings for so long. What could he say?

“Well… it’s not too late,” Shuuichi said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “You said Kokichi’s had a bad week, right? That means you have enough insight on him to tell he’s feeling bad from that, and he trusts you enough to tell you. It’s working at least a little bit.”

Kaito paused to think before his face brightened. “You know what? You’re right. Thanks for that, bro. And don’t worry about Kokichi. I’ll try talking to him.”

“No problem.”

It was only after getting drinks with Kaito and walking home that Shuuichi remembered the thing he needed was lightbulbs and his bedroom was completely dark.

But it was worth it. If he wasn’t able to comfort someone during a rough week, he was glad someone else could.

And if Shuuichi saw Kokichi giving a strained wave to Kaito in the hallways when Monday rolled around, that was their business.

 

* * *

 

Bombing the first DBQ was expected. In fact, Shuuichi and Kokichi had even warned their students not to expect a good grade on their first DBQ and planned to teach the correct format afterwards with various drills to assist them. It wasn’t even going in the gradebook, yet Shuuichi was more upset at the results than his students surely would be.

Shuuichi bit his lip as he marked yet another inaccuracy in the text of a student’s frantic writing. The question was based on a concept they had already learned in biology, and the students were already failing in the biology aspect of it. He couldn’t imagine how the language arts portion was holding up.

But… was this really on the students? Was he setting his class up for failure?  _ Was he being a bad teacher— _

“Shuuichi.”

A familiar voice pulled him out of his self-loathing. He looked up, only to see his co-teacher sitting next to him behind his desk. Shuuichi couldn’t recall when Kokichi had pulled another rolly chair into the room, much less when Kokichi had entered and shut the door in the first place, but he was in no position to tell him to get out.

Shuuichi wiped at his eyes, careful not to let his tears drop onto the papers. “I-I just… I’m sorry.”

“That’s stupid. You don’t need to be sorry for anything,” Kokichi said with a frown. He huffed at the lack of response before pushing his head into the crook of Shuuichi’s neck, his eyes fixed onto his open laptop. “Now, tell me what’s wrong.”

Shuuichi hesitated. “I always feel bad giving people bad grades, especially on a large scale like this.”

“Why?”

“It… I don’t know.” Shuuichi trailed off as he leaned into the warmth snuggling into his neck. Everything felt numb, but the warmth anchored him back to reality. “I really don’t know.”

Kokichi hummed as he wiped a tear away from Shuuichi’s eye and continued typing out an email. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s  _ not— _ ”

“Then it’ll be okay. And that’s not a lie.”

Deep down, Shuuichi knew he was right. It was only a month into school, and they had a good portion of the year left to teach. There was no reason to get so worked up about something they expected would get low scores anyway.

So he continued grading with a heavy heart made just a bit lighter by the person sitting beside him.

 

* * *

 

Meetings were boring even at the best of times, especially when the other members thought it was boring as well. And that definitely wasn’t helped by the fact the meeting was being held in Shuuichi’s boring room.

“Mr. Saihara,” Himiko called out, her eyes half-lidded from exhaustion. “No offense, but your room’s boring. Do you want some lights from my room?”

Shuuichi gave her a tense smile as the other members of the science department took a seat at a table. “I’m fine.”

He was not fine.

Makoto set a laptop down on his desk. “Excuse me, Mr. Saihara, but I need to draw something on the board for this meeting. Do you mind pulling the projector screen up for me?”

“Oh, no problem.” Shuuichi leaned forward and pulled the screen up. He turned around towards the seated teachers. “Should I make my statement about the changes in the state department now or—”

Laughter bubbled at the table.

Shuuichi’s heart sank. “I don’t think it’s very funny, but—”

“Gonta thinks you should look behind you,” Gonta said with his lips turned up into a grin.

Shuuichi whirled around, only to see familiar handwriting that was not his on the board.

_ Why was the marine biologist so happy? He had finally found his porpoise. _ In another color marker, a “nishishi” and peace sign had been drawn next to the words, making it abundantly clear who had left the messages.

The joke was so bad Shuuichi had to laugh.

Makoto’s face brightened. “I take it SPIRE is going well?”

“Ah, yes,” Shuuichi said. Even though his nervousness around authority figures hadn’t completely subsided, the words on the board were like his anchor to reality. “I think students learn better this way. They learn to analyze language while learning biology standards. I think it’s a productive use of time. We’re currently on the cells of Henrietta Lacks.”

“And how’s the co-teaching?”

That made Shuuichi pause to think. He had never co-taught before. The only person he knew who had taught with another teacher on a daily basis was Kaito, and his co-taught class only lasted for a semester before the administrators had gotten rid of it for lack of cooperation between the teachers. Everything he knew about co-teaching, he had to learn on his own.

Yet it was a wonderful experience. They had gotten off on a rocky start, but there was still more than half the year left. And especially considering how utterly unpredictable Kokichi was, who knew what would come next?

Shuuichi smiled. “It’s going great. I like working with a friend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi's grammar lesson: yes, this is a thing that actually happened in my class. i have no words.
> 
> DBQ: Document Based Question. the bane of my existence. luckily in SPIRE, it was just us having to use the document in some way to answer all the parts of a question. in history class, it's using at least 7 documents to write an entire essay supporting a thesis. and you need to throw in something from memory and a complexity point to show you know what youre doing ~~i dont~~
> 
> let me know if you have any questions!

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is heavily based off my own school's procedures with some changes.
> 
> SPIRE: this is an actual course at my school people can take. I took it. I hated it. It was a year-long class. Don't be me.
> 
> Pods and Room Numbers: At my school, everything is arranged by pods (A, B, C, D) and the room number designates which floor it's on. For example, room A-213 would be in the A pod upstairs while C-103 would be in the C pod downstairs. It's confusing and I still get lost sometimes
> 
> Thinking Like A Mountain: My biology teacher's favorite book apparently. We didn't have to read it in class (thank god) but we had to read an excerpt
> 
> Fahrenheit 451: A book where people burn books. 451F also happens to be the temperature at which paper burns.
> 
> Rachmaninoff Piano Concertos: I've accompanied someone playing concerto no. 2 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEGOihjqO9w). not that specific person but it's my favorite
> 
> Let me know if you have any questions.


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